Skip to main content

Judgement of a 'Baba'

Bell rings. Girl opens door. Is startled at a brahmin clad in a dhoti, immediately closes the door to a point that she can only barely peek.

"You can't peek into a man's face and know his soul. I have just come to announce a religious gathering tonight at the ground, 7 pm onwards. Please inform your parents and everybody at home."

"Um. Okay. I'll do that."

"Have any of you ever been to shirdi on pilgrimage?"

"No not so far. Don't know. No no."

"It's okay to be startled. I know you weren't raised like a daughter at all in your home. You were raised like a son. You know that it's unwise to be trusting. It's good to have a clean heart, but you should never pretend to know the world."

"I don't even know who you are, and here you are standing at my door, telling me random things about me! You just told me i was raised like a son from my dress up. But let me tell you. I can call your bluff."

"You've been working hard haven't you. You see snakes in your dreams. Please don't kill them, no, that'll be unwise."

"I don't! There aren't no snakes!"

"Just hope that the freedom that you have in your home, you'll get in your other home. You've been working so hard for the last two years. You hope against hope you know. It shows."

"Okay. What consequence is all this?"

"No consequence. We're all going to Gangasagar. If it's in your heart, you must not let a brahmin return empty handed from your doorstep. Also, you should keep your mondays. It's okay if you don't fast. I don't think you'd do that. Just don't wash your hair on mondays."

"Are you going to eat Halwa? Because that's all i can give at the moment."

"For all the skepticism that you have. I have a fast today. Whatever you find in your heart"

"I'll give you some money."

"I'll take your leave now. Take care. Because people think they spot a bluff too easily. They don't read what's in your heart you know."

"You can't peek into a man's face and know his soul. Goodbye."

Popular posts from this blog

angry

my grandmother used to spot in us a hereditary anger the chest learning to well up blood learning to leap and breath learning to crawl foreheads burning with heat of little children the attempt of anger to become disgusting raging energy that will occupy every living stream. nobody wants to hold an angry person rage drunk, getting bigger and bigger until other people are invisible like ants and you can dissolve them in your hot blood and things around you break and shatter at this point she would hold. a violent hand shaking her away Ya I remember my grandmother used to spot it in us as children already And hold our hand "until you get over your rage I will not let go of your hand"  hold VERY TIGHTLY "I will not leave your hand until you learn how you should calm down" i would fail despite that gesture  to understand what was happening and i could not receive love at that time because i have so much anger But the act she is doing is still that of HOLDING

लाल वस्तू

महाराजबागेतल्या गुंजेच्या झाडाखाली आईबरोबर बसून घालवलेल्या संध्याकाळी गुंजेचा पाला खाताना गुंजा वेचून, गोळा करून, घरी आणून सजवताना तशाच लाल गुंजांसारखे मखमली किडे पाळताना, त्यांना पावसाळ्यात पकडताना त्यांचा पाला गोळा करताना त्यांना लाजून गुर्फटताना बघताना, आईला दाखवताना मला थोडेच माहिति होते की हे अनुभव, आणि ह्या आठवणी कधी अशृ होतील आणि लाल शर्ट घालून त्या पावसाळ्याची आज तहान भागवावी लागेल

transitive

 i used to think the transitivity of verbs was like romance i (a subject) take you, or you take me (as an object) defined already through transitivity. i take you (there) or i take (missing) (missing) or i play (the piano) then i thought transitivity of verbs was like valence missing electrons in individual shells,  filled up by an incomprehensible spdf rhyme-scheme then i thought transitivity of verbs was illusory i present (you) with (thing) i present (you) to (infinity) i shower (you) with (love) i pointed (it) at (you) and that i could say i sleep you to dreams or otherwhere illusory. or the sevan kaarak classes i could fit any construction in a new logic i play (you) to (infinity) through (trees) in order (to sleep).   we can just use language however we please really and things that aren't understood now can still feel like something. a new action-class is always just around the next turn from use