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Staircase

You show me pictures of you,
engulfed in the arms of your lover
only a small window to you
removing from your memory

all men you have ever known
all the things you have ever done that
don't any longer seem like happy memories.

That was then the best you could do
and once - the most,
and the happiest you could make yourself

Now you convince yourself that
they were all steps of a staircase.

And these new leaves too will fall
and this place too would be
fit for erasing.
one day

And another place would seem like
the happiest you could ever be
until you stop trying to go
for a long walk
or drink tea late
at night and stop trying to get warmth
from any other person
anymore.

Make your own bed
stop trying to reach meaning with
the help of dialog
meaning from the crevices of a ceiling fan,
meaning from an anthill like an anteater
meaning in the dust of everyday.

One day there will be a frozen happiness,
you would eat it up
before it melted and stained your shirt
and left any mark
Making it impossible to replace with new happiness.

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